MM – Labor of love

Hubby & I left the house this afternoon at 4pm, heading to the store to pick up a few things (none of which were holiday related). We got home around 10pm. I swear we got sucked into a time vortex that somehow turned a half hour into six. The end result (besides the wallet damage) is that my first Musing Monday will be a re-post of another dusted off entry from my old blog. This one is still from the time that I wrote as my alter-ego, Catherine Trevor.

Labor of Love
Posted by InternetGeek at October 10, 2005 08:23 PM

I feel like an expectant mother.

Not just because I went to Applebees in Dover Friday night with a couple of friends and ate way more than my share of that sinfully chocolate brownie thing they have for dessert. But because the process of birthing this blog every other day or so has become a much more involved process than I thought. Yes, I’m a bit obsessive/compulsive… how’d you guess? *grin*

While waiting for my blog idea to be approved, I went on a rampage and wrote almost two dozen beginnings for various entries. You would think I could just pick and choose what I want for each day – in fact, that was part of my grand plan. However, I find that even if I write something ahead of time, on the day I plan to upload it, I end up tearing it apart and re-writing it, or changing my mind and going with a completely different idea. It becomes an all day affair – much of that time muttering it out loud to myself, and asking my feline companion Jobi what he thinks about a certain phrasing or passage.

The process tends to go thusly – I have the excited “I can’t wait to find out if it’s a boy or girl” phase as I begin to explore my thought for the day. I pass the time with large quantities of food, washed down with beverages such as tea, coffee or Coke that guarantee a pee run every 15 minutes or so – which is a real pain when I’m at work, and I can’t just point to my belly and say, “sorry, just got kicked in the bladder” by way of explanation. Then, after waiting for an eternity, which inevitably leads to the feeling that it’s just not ever going to happen, I begin to feel the early pangs in my head signaling my brain is shutting down, and it’s time to get that baby out into the world. Which is followed closely by much screaming and gnashing of teeth as I upload the entry, knowing it’s not ready for the world, and worrying that it will only find a lifetime of pain and rejection because I somehow failed to gestate this creature to it’s fullest potential.

Yet, for all the discomfort I go through in producing these virtual children of mine, as I read through the comments (both here and on the RoosterTeeth website), I feel a sense of pride and accomplishment, and I can’t wait to go through the process again. And thank the gods that these little angels don’t ever need new shoes…

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